18 Easy Steps of DomiNations

[ivan.]

1. Reach Industrial Age.

2. Realize that upgrades now take over a week, and nothing else to do while waiting.

3. Decide you still enjoy the game and may as well try and climb medals for fun.

4. Quickly realize that every battle is +1/-39 so you switch to a raiders army for one medal sniping.

5. Eventually find no opponents so you continuously two-button click searching for battles.

6. Check into a hospital for carpel tunnel.

7. Now with a wrist-brace, continue grinding towards Dynasty for the precious 2000 crown reward.

8. Finally reach Dynasty and use the crowns to switch to French, because who wouldn't.

9. Find yourself on the leaderboard and decide you may as well try and see how high you can climb.

10. Pop your broken peace treaty cherry and receive crown compensation.

11. You eventually regain your medals and climb until another peace treaty breaks and you receive compensation.

12. Nonetheless, you try again and reach the top leader ranks until another peace treaty breaks.

13. Repeat steps 11-12 ad-infinitum.

14. Realize you've devolved into a robot completing menial tasks for an artificial currency in compensation.

15. Look at yourself in the mirror and see a shell of your former self.

16. Lie down

17. Try not to cry.

18. Cry a lot.



DomiNations is love. DomiNations is life.

 

[Nathan Win]

What a sad life at the top. Game is stale when you're high up. If BGH/Nexon doesn't implement any new features and content, people will quit.

 

[Hunter Killer]

Haha Ivan, that's pretty accurate. I'm still at step 13, how long does it take to reach the next step?

After I read the title, I was expecting to see some steps about putting on some black latex costume, finding yourself a whip etc... I'm disappointed!

 

[ivan.]

No latex needed. This game is already a stand alone masochistic experience in itself.

 

[Ravenlord]

1. Reach Industrial Age.

2. Realize that upgrades now take over a week, and nothing else to do while waiting.

3. Decide you still enjoy the game and may as well try and climb medals for fun.

4. Quickly realize that every battle is +1/-39 so you switch to a raiders army for one medal sniping.

5. Eventually find no opponents so you continuously two-button click searching for battles.

6. Check into a hospital for carpel tunnel.

7. Now with a wrist-brace, continue grinding towards Dynasty for the precious 2000 crown reward.

8. Finally reach Dynasty and use the crowns to switch to French, because who wouldn't.

9. Find yourself on the leaderboard and decide you may as well try and see how high you can climb.

10. Pop your broken peace treaty cherry and receive crown compensation.

11. You eventually regain your medals and climb until another peace treaty breaks and you receive compensation.

12. Nonetheless, you try again and reach the top leader ranks until another peace treaty breaks.

13. Repeat steps 11-12 ad-infinitum.

14. Realize you've devolved into a robot completing menial tasks for an artificial currency in compensation.

15. Look at yourself in the mirror and see a shell of your former self.

16. Lie down

17. Try not to cry.

18. Cry a lot.

I can hardly wait !!

What does it say about me that I have 1 civ already in IA and two more getting there? (at least, when Nexon fixes my civs!!)

 

[RushSkies]

Its all Ogre now.

 

[Tipek]

Easy steps of Dominations (from BHG pov): 1. Lure unsuspecting beta testers with a revolutionary genre-changing game
2. Release the game when you know it's not ready
3. Lure more unsuspecting players
4. Nerf everything they hold dear
5. Wait for players to uncover more things to nerf
6. Repeat steps 4 and 5 while releasing more content for your cheating player-base
7. Finally, nerf any last possible option for non-paying players to compete in an otherwise completely cheat or pay-to-win competition
8. ????
9. PROFIT!!!

 

[acied]

Time to move on to another game...., any suggestions ?

 

[Alex_Brach]

1. Reach Industrial Age.

2. Realize that upgrades now take over a week, so you have to find something else to do.

3. Decide you still enjoy the game and may as well try and climb medals for fun.

4. Quickly realize that every battle is +1/-39 so you switch to a raiders army for one medal sniping.

5. Eventually find no opponents, so you realize the game is not ready at the top level yet.

6. You decide to have fun building your walls as far as possible while waiting for Nexon to work out the issues.

7. You join an awesome alliance where frequent chatting and exchange of knowledge makes the game about a lot more than medals.

8. You have fun with steps 6 and 7 until Nexon fixes the game issues.

9. Nexon releases Alliance Wars, fixes the no-opponent issue, fixes the ai and the crashes, and much more.

10. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun

 

[GailWho]

You forgot ...

8a. Start playing a 2nd account while on pt on 1st account to have fun while not making the same mistakes as the 1st account to see if you can do it faster and better.

8b. When it's ready, take 2nd account for a walkabout to visit other alliances and chat with more people until #9 happens then... Let the games begin!

 

[Parmenion]

List looks about right to me. I'm at no. 6 (kind of) as had surgery on the extensor tendons of my right hand yesterday. Not a result of the game though lol.

Hopefully the 5 day peace treaty I bought with crowns doesn't break.

 

[dbukalski]

1. Reach Industrial Age.

2. Realize that upgrades now take over a week, so you have to find something else to do.

3. Decide you still enjoy the game and may as well try and climb medals for fun.

4. Quickly realize that every battle is +1/-39 so you switch to a raiders army for one medal sniping.

5. Eventually find no opponents, so you realize the game is not ready at the top level yet.

6. You decide to have fun building your walls as far as possible while waiting for Nexon to work out the issues.

7. You join an awesome alliance where frequent chatting and exchange of knowledge makes the game about a lot more than medals.

8. You have fun with steps 6 and 7 until Nexon fixes the game issues.

9. Nexon releases Alliance Wars, fixes the no-opponent issue, fixes the ai and the crashes, and much more.

10. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun

step 8 for me. the fun alliance part is important

 

[Cannibals]

I'm on 8a!

 

[Vissor]

Help me pls,shrek is here...

 

[Alex_Brach]

What? I thought you guys would be with your third account at this point .

 

[Eddie F1]

1. Reach Industrial Age.

2. Realize that upgrades now take over a week, so you have to find something else to do.

3. Decide you still enjoy the game and may as well try and climb medals for fun.

4. Quickly realize that every battle is +1/-39 so you switch to a raiders army for one medal sniping.

5. Eventually find no opponents, so you realize the game is not ready at the top level yet.

6. You decide to have fun building your walls as far as possible while waiting for Nexon to work out the issues.

7. Realise you've spent over 1000 hours of your life getting this far and BHG are incapable of fixing any problems only creating new ones.

8. Download XCode and learn C, start software development company and write own version of game - it'll be quicker.

9. Knock CoC off No 1. spot and trouser oodles of $$$.

10. Lots more Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun

 

[Magnifico]

1. Reach Industrial Age.

2. Realize that upgrades now take over a week, so you have to find something else to do.

3. Decide you still enjoy the game and may as well try and climb medals for fun.

4. Quickly realize that every battle is +1/-39 so you switch to a raiders army for one medal sniping.

5. Eventually find no opponents, so you realize the game is not ready at the top level yet.

6. You decide to have fun building your walls as far as possible while waiting for Nexon to work out the issues.

7. Realise you've spent over 1000 hours of your life getting this far and BHG are incapable of fixing any problems only creating new ones.

8. Download XCode and learn C, start software development company and write own version of game - it'll be quicker.

9. Knock CoC off No 1. spot and trouser oodles of $$$.

10. Lots more Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun

11. Start forum. Have your programming competence, game design abilities, and basic integrity savaged daily by dozens of disgruntled players.

 

[Eddie F1]

Thanks, I hadn't thought of that!

I'll have to uninstall XCode now and return the investor's funding and go back to my day job.


Or..

I suppose I could completely ignore the forum and never read any posts, that might work? What do you think?

 

[Guest]

Forums are always an interesting place. I've been working to make them better, but it takes everyone to really make them work. It's been nice seeing some of our more advanced users chime in to help new folks.

 

[Jasonian Empire]

Interesting, maybe- but you'd have to have the thick skin of a rhinoceros to be a moderator here. I wouldn't want your job, to be perfectly honest.